for the strength to be strong for the will to carry on for everything you do for everything that's true i turn to you... sometimes i just wish that i can escape from my life and go to the land of Heart's Desire. everything's going wrong with my life now. i smile not to show my happiness, but to show that im strong but im breaking inside. it seems that in times like this the only option is to run away, but then life would be a battle lost. i have to carry on living life. dumb maths teacher. he gave us a huge assignment then said that he had given us the wrong q.s so we have to redo it again. i have so many tests coming up. im done with physics but there's still chem, maths, chinese. sigh. welcome to my monotonous school life. when life's messed up, just pray. prayer brings this undescrible sense and peace and calm. seek comfort in God. it seems that my resolution to stay happy for 05 might not be justified. after all, what with the unpredictable events taking place, and the turbulent emotions that follow, i wonder, when have i truly been happy? yesterday i had chinese tuition. following that, went shopping AGAIN. i bought more clothes. shopping bores me. the sadder i am, the more i try to cover up by looking happy and at peace with myself. i guess that when i do that i am actually betraying my emotions. there's a hude war going on inside of me. no, its not between good and evil. rather, its me fighting against myself. either way, i lose. im getting more frustrated, so yea..ill stop blabbering. i hate my life and i want out.
