Wednesday, May 24, 2006
Marit Larsen
Under the surface
http://www.marit-larsen.com/media.aspx?docid=45
go there, select high/low resolution and it will load
in window's media player!
It's such a funny sensation to be
so happy that you wanna die
Promises always were crazy to me
But never was I so surprised
Minutes are longer when we are apart
Your presence's more than I can handle
It's come to the point where I wonder if I could ever be luckier
When suddenly I'm back at the core
Thinking of her who had you before
Were you as good
As good as we are
Do you remember?
Did you love her the way you love me?
Is there a chance that there might be
traces of her that you carry under the surface?
Lend me your ears, I would like to confess
I'm doubting that you could be real
By your side wearing a beautiful dress
I celebrate how good it feels
Say that you love me, say that it's true
I know that I want to believe you
But somehow silence speaks louder than words
I'm worried she's still on your mind
Suddenly I'm back at the core
Thinking of her who had you before
Were you as good
As good as we are
Do you remember?
Did you love her the way you love me?
Is there a chance that there might be
traces of her that you carry under the surface?
Mmm I know that I'm selfish
I know that it's bad
I know, but it's driving me mad
It's driving me mad
Suddenly I'm back at the core
Thinking of her who had you before
Were you as good
As good as we are
Do you remember?
Did you love her the way you love me?
Is there a chance that there might be
traces of her that you carry under the surface?
under the surface
under the surface
i know that i've been very lazy,
copying any pasting stuff but i've been rather
busy, chinese O levels on monday..
anyways, this is one of the most beautiful songs i've ever heard
in my entire life.
it's about *gasp* having second thoughts
at the altar,just a few seconds before getting married.
yeah,its the worst scenario possible,no?
its also about mistrust.
although this song carries a sad message across,
it is a perfect mirror of the imperfections
of even the purest thing,love.
and it is a beautifully broken and depressing song.
yeap.
cya all..
i won't posting till after the chinese Os.
Clara.
ps: gd luck one and all!
7:11 PM
Monday, May 22, 2006
She had eyes like crazy diamonds
And you ran with feet of clay
they rolled the windows tight as they would go
It was a smoggy day
She looked up and asked me
if I ever had a lover that I did not betray
And I turned on the radio and
I looked the other way
She said you're smart, but in a stupid way
[Chorus]
And this is the price that you pay
For being smart in a stupid way
You stand there staring while your lover walks away
Being smart, in a stupid way
The doors they close like eyelids
The train just pulled away
Sometimes I smell the perfume
that she was wearing that day
And i wonder if there's anyone
that i'll ever love in any way
Maybe I'll grow up and be good someday
Maybe this pain I feel will go away
[Chorus]
And this is the price that you pay
For being smart in a stupid way
You stand there staring while your lover walks away
Being smart, in a stupid way
So why is my heart so hollow
Why are my dreams so shallow
And why don't I ever have anything else to say
And why is my love so far away
[Chorus]
And this is the price that you pay
For being smart in a stupid way
You stand there staring while your lover walks away
Being smart, in a stupid way
my favvy chill-out song right now.
steven strait ft ashlee simpson
smart in a stupid way.
i love how this song talks about how
some people think with their heads
not their hearts.
basically,when it comes to love,
if you think with your head,
you'll manage to not get hurt at all.
but if you think with your heart,
you'll be happier.
so..will you think with your head or your heart?
will you choose what is good for you..
or will you choose what will make you happy?
thought provoking eh?
today and yesterday i wasn't feeling great.
my stomach was feeling like i had food poisoning.
so i went to see my family doctor today.
it turned out i had stomach flu.
sounds weird,huh?
and apparently i was suffering from some gastric
pain as well.
sicksicksick.
but now i'm feeling a lot better even though
i haven't touched the medicine yet.
time heals indeed.
its gonna rain hard here.
there's a huge dark cloud
hovering ominously nearby.
sometimes do you feel as though
you have your own personal
black cloud above you,
and ever so often it rains down on you.
i'm feeling that way too today.
a pointless entry,but an entry nonetheless.
i'll better switch off the computer.
i wanna snooze,baby.
5:00 PM
Wednesday, May 17, 2006
i was just looking at my love/hate list and realised that
it doesn't do me much justice but i don't feel like changing it.
i shall add on to those lists today.
i hardly ever change, so i still do love/hate those things
already on the list.muahaha.
i'm in a weird mood.pardon me.
i'll try not to make this boring.
i LOVE:
-whatever's on the list.
+
-stars!
-lightning
-reading
-writing short,confusing stories
-writing poems.(at least, i try)
-blogging!
-furry animals
-parrots!
-horse riding
-new zealand
-florence!
-all my other buddies
-school.(i know,i know.laugh all you want)
-chemistry tuition
-english!
-ashlee simpson music
-all kinds of music that doesn't give me a massive headache
-someone =)
-masking my emotions.(and trust me,i'm great at that)
-reading the Life! section of the ST.
-daydreaming
-sleeping.
-stoning.(believe me when i say that while i'm stoning my brain's actually on overdrive.)
-dying roses!( don't you love how theywilt so gracefully?)
so i want a dying bouquet of roses for valentine's day.weird,but its so nice.
-white flowers even though they symbolise death
-Deedee from dextor's lab
-scooby doo!
-thriller movies.
-ZOMBIE flicks!
-northern lights!
-kim tae hee- the most beautiful asian in the worldd.
-sad sad poems/stories.
-having a way with words.
-rainbow!
there're many more but my mind's a blank right now.
so i'll hurry on to what i hate.
i HATE:
-clowns
-being trapped in between lift doors.
-the mrt ticket entry machine.( i keep thinking that they'll close on me)
-fire!
-contradiction
-the viking ride
-goodbyes
-injections!
-" I told you so "
-sore throats
-fear
-injustice!!
-terrorism
-mornings( even though they're supposedly new beginnings,i'm a night person)
-tantrums
-nagging!
-being pestered
-being accused of stuff i didn't do.period.
-copycats.
-the smell of fertilisers
-forests
-FLUS
-bird flu
-getting a shock from the music on my blog.(haha.ever gotten scared?)
-hot dreary afternoons with nothing to do.
and many more...
i just wanted to post this:
a poem i wrote during the chinese composition exams with whatever time i had left.
OH MANNN....
I CAN'T FIND THE PAPER ANYWHERE>>I THINK SOMEONE THREW IT AWAY!!
i cannot express in words how very pissed i am right now.
i'l try to write it out from memory..but it was almost 3 weeks ago.
DA*N
oh and i highlighted the rhyming words in red cause
its hard to tell given how long my sentences are.
the girl was only twelve,
but she knew neither joy nor wealth.
all she had was an old tattered teddy bear
and a rusty old bike becuase she couldn't afford the bus fare.
her parents hit her day and night
all they ever did was fight.
she would huddle in a corner and cry
they always took those pills,she didn't know why.
that fateful day she was cycling in the park
it was half past eight,and the sky was dark.
her parents were drunk;she tried to sneak into her room
but they seized her, and she met her doom.
her dearest mother gripped a kitchen knife
and plunged it into the girl's heart to end her life.
the girl's vision started to blur
and everything became a whir.
the next morning the police were greeted by a sad sight
when they rushed down to the scene at daylight.
in the run-down kitchen, blood was everywhere.
and in the center of it all, lay a girl clutching a bear.
the loss of such an innocent,pure life
was caused by a drunk man and his wife.
they will never be able to undo the harm,
but at least she died with her best friend in her arms.
i really do hope you like it even though its kinda dark and solemn.
its about such a real thing happening in our midst,
drug abuse and alcohol abuse, in turn leading to child abuse.
its a vicious cycle.and someone has to break it.
alright,i'm going to bed now.
tomorrow's gonna be a long day.
Clara
xoxoxo
9:43 PM
Tuesday, May 09, 2006
And this is the price that you pay
For being smart in a stupid way
You stand there staring while
your lover walks away
Being smart, in a stupid way.
tomorrow is sorta the last day of mid-years.
at least, for me.
i had a four hour tuition today.
again.
i think throughout the course of
this mid-year exam,
i went at least 10 times.
exhausting,but fufilling.
happy birthday to mingyue!
i didn't know till today.heh.
now,
i have a friend.lets call her xx.
and for some shallow reason,
many people in school
ostracise her.
and by many, i mean a
three digit number easily.
why? just because of a disagreement
between her and some of the more popular
kids in school.
and lets face it.
this world can be rather blind.
we follow the crowd and go with the flow.
regardless of whether those kids are
right or wrong.
that's life.
so everyone shuns her.
but honestly,
lets look at this from a different perspective.
how can you judge a person
based on how they treat their enemy?
think about it.
if i were to judge you
from how you treat someone you hate,
then you would too be a "horrible" person.
but you're not.
and xx is not too.
if you think that she's horrible,
then go drown yourself.
seriously.you are so narrow-minded
and you're as shallow as a swimming pool for ants.
there is good in everyone.
and personally,
i can't stand it when injustice wins
just because of its sheer numbers.
just because there are many of those kids,
so they are right.
and the right person is wrong.
that stinks.
however,sometimes life is like that.
and we gotta make a stand.
right or wrong.
its better to 'lose' but be morally upright
than to 'win' but be totally wrong.
if you all knew what a great friend xx is,
you all would hang your heads in shame.
and sometimes,
those people who practically worship
those popular kids treat us,xx's friends
badly too.
its pretty obvious.
you know what?
damn you to hell and back again.
then damn you again.
i have been tolerating such nonsensical
crap ever since goodness knows when.
and i'm sick of it.
the effing slut clab and whatnot.
piss off, you lot.
and what's most disapointing is,
people whom i used to be on talking
terms with suddenly turn their back on me.
i'm really mad at that.
not for the loss of the friendship,
because i would honestly be
better off without such friends.
but i'm mad that you lack so much common sense.
alright,go to the 'dark' side.
they have cookies.
but you know what?
they don't give a damn about you.
you are just another servant,minion if you will
and they are just making use of you to add on to
their already large numbers.
for pete's sake,shake yourself out of it.
you're not 'accepted' as you would like to believe.
you're just plain deluded.
i'm hoping that when you all grow up
to be adults,you'll look back
and regret that you did not stand up for what's right.
mind you,i wrote this entry without
a bias mindset.that's what's happening
every single day.
and there are the people who dislike
me because i quit their cca.
i have former best friends
acting like they don't know me at all.
it hurts,i have to admit.
but from today,
i'll never let that bother me.
and i feel sorry for your new friends.
they're don't know what they're in for.
i do everything for a reason.
why did i quit that cca?
because it sucks.
on the outside,it might look so
professional.but inside,
its all in shambles.
all the bitching and backstabbing.
its so amazing that i just feel like laughing.
THAT'S why i quit.
face the facts.
its not that i did not have any interest in it.
but it just sucks to the core.
sometimes i feel too much.
but from now on,i shan't care.
there are more beautiful things in life to
care about.
and i have more important things to worry
about.
goodbye to my old life.
hail the new,sensible life
where i don't give a sh*t about obnoxious people.
life is a bitch because if it were a slut,
it would be easy.
9:03 PM
Sunday, May 07, 2006
humans are capable..
of causing much destruction.
all it takes is one simple tool.
the pen is mightier than the sword.
but the tongue is mightier than the pen.
the endless boundaries of speech are to be marvelled at.
with one's tongue,
one can utter untruths to make up for all that they lack.
one can speak the truth,
untainted,in all its brutal honesty.
one can betray someone dear,
one can command death.
one can cause another to strive on,
or bring another's ego crashing down.
the tongue mutters words.
words can
be like a swift stab to the chest
or a light in the darkest times.
they could be stumbling blocks,
or they could be a fissure
on the steepest of slopes.
words can be the very essense of life.
with one's tongue,
one can.
but yet sometimes,
even words fail to describe.
you are my fait accompli.
clara.
9:36 PM
Friday, May 05, 2006
This is my 200th post!
unfortunately,
its going to be a rather boring one.
the mid-years are not over yet.sadly.
but i'll just have a couple more papers.
some papers were reasonable,
some were hard.
overall,i have put in 50% of hard work.
the low percentage is because i started
studying so late.
i'm really tired,
more tired than i have ever remembered
being in my entire life.
i've been mugging till 12+pm,
and i wake up early the next day to continue.
its no fun.i've been getting occasional flus.
other than that,
i've been fine.
tired,but fine.
i wanna watch
"when a stranger calls."
my head is starting to hurt now,
so i'll stop here.
have a good day!
Clara
7:56 PM